Loss of beloved pet still leaves void

By Jim Osterman | Monday, January 21, 2008, 07:13 AM
The Atlanta Journal-Constitution

The math is our house doesn’t work.

Three pet dishes are out in the back yard, but there are only two dogs.

There are three large dog pillows in the living room, but only two are in use at any given time.

And in the morning only two dogs come running out of the part of the basement that houses three crates.

On Christmas Eve I fed our three dogs - Jake, Sydney and Molly. An hour later when I whistled them in Jake and Sydney came running. Five minutes later Molly came out the dark, walking as though every step brought pain. It did.

Ten minutes later we were at the emergency vet. And 10 more minutes a sonogram brought the sad report. It was cancer. A tumor that had not bothered her until that might had ruptured. There would be no Christmas miracle and there would be no happy ending.

But there was a blessing for Molly and for us. When she left this world she was surrounded by the four people who loved her best, her family. There would be no more cancer, no more pain and no more fear. We should all be so blessed.

Since that night the house has been slightly out of kilter. As I said, this has been a house for three dogs and now there are only two.

For Jake and Sydney, well, they have not quite been the same. Molly was the alpha dog and no one has assumed her mantle.

And as for us we miss her in a hundred different ways. We not longer hear her sneeze from inhaling dust while searching for crumbs on the kitchen floor. A light rain no longer brings her insistent bark at the back door. A recent trip out of town yielded a smaller-than-usual kennel bill, as two dogs costs less to board than three.

Her leash is still in the car, where it has been since Christmas Eve. There is no hurry or reason to move it.

I know some reading this will be dismissive and will tell me that all this sentiment over a pet is wasted. “It was only a dog,” you might say. And I won’t argue with you, because it’s not important to me that you understand the grief that lingers in the background in our house.

And at night when I bring the dogs in for the evening, Jake and Sydney come tumbling into the house and I hold the door open for an extra second, out of love’s habit.